Disclaimer: Not a pity seeking post!
I posted about the promise God gave me in an earlier post (https://michaelmyrickblog.blogspot.com/2013/02/between-now-and-ok.html). So let me follow up with that.
I am currently in “between now and OK”. After my surgery I soon realized that many of the nerves to my neck, shoulder and arm were affected. I experienced mild to extreme pain daily. I kept telling my wife, son and myself that it would go away over time. I prayed for it to go away, asked others pray, and continued to believe it would subside. I took the medicines the doctor prescribed, only to find that I walked around in a fog. Fast forward to now, 3 ½ cancer free years later.
I got up yesterday and had a hard time moving my right arm. When you go to the doctor they ask you to rate your pain from 1 to 10, 1 being no pain and 10 means to go the hospital. As I drove myself to work I began to cry. Yes, a grown man driving down the interstate crying! I could not help it; the pain was at a 10. Many of you would ask, “why did you not go the hospital?” Well honestly, there is nothing they can do. This happens multiple times a week and I have to get it together before getting to work. After all, I drive a stick shift and it just so happens that I have to shift with my right arm. The pain also makes it difficult to get ready some mornings. Many of my friends ask how I am doing and of course I tell them I am doing “fine”. After all no one wants to hear about my pain all the time, although if my wife is around she will not let me get away with that. I don’t and won’t let the pain stop me from doing much, but I have started to learn my limitations.
So why am I sharing about my pain now? I want others to realize that no matter what pain you are in or what type of pain, Jesus is there to hold you and let you cry. He understands when we get mad about it and sometimes raise our voice at Him. He has no problem with the “why”, because He will help you to understand.
In other posts I will talk about the extreme emotional side of chronic pain. That subject may have to be multiple posts.