Surgery is less than 24 hours away. Walking down the hall to the break room I was asked twice, “are you ready?” The answer honestly is yes/no.
I not ready for the pain. I am not ready for the disruption to my life. I am not ready for my wife and son to see me in a weakened state. I am not ready to have to depend on others to do simple tasks for 3 to 4 weeks. I am not ready to deal with the finances. I am not ready to wait to see if they got it all out. For these, I am not ready!
I am ready for “I AM”. I am ready to see God work through my wife and son to minister to me. I am ready to watch as friends love on us. I am ready for God to continue to show me how precious life is. I am ready for the day when the doctor says, “you are cancer free!” I am ready for “I AM”. Why do I keep saying that? I am ready for Jesus to show off. I am ready for the peace to grow, like only the peace He provides can. He is called I AM! He is the God of the past, present and future. Yes in the past He was there and in the future He will be there. Most importantly thing right now is that He is now, I AM! Not just I was or I will be, He is now.
James 1:2-4 says:
2Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.
I have underlined “so let it grow”, because that is our responsibility. I am to allow this to grow my faith. When? NOW! He is I AM.
Thank you for your prayers, gifts and support during the difficult time. My friends and family are unbelievable!